This weekend, Esplanade's Theatre studio is graced by a perculiar piece of work, I am trying to say something true. The text-heavy script says a lot of things, dropping one too many truth bombs in rapid succession; They leave you as quickly as they came - before you can fully grasp what they were saying. And yet, maybe that was the point of Michelle Tan's contribution to The Studios' theme of dying and living.
The audience is led by Risa, a former civil servant, going through her therapy sessions after a meltdown at work. Triggered by bureaucratic double-speak rife in pragmatic Singapore, Risa is confronted with the realisation that she has trouble saying how she truly feels... And struggles to reconcile the most intimate part of her - her attraction to other woman - with the family members closest to her heart.
Under the direction of T. Sasitharan, Ellison Tan paces the space at varying intensity, stripping off the layers (quite literally) of an at first sarcastic and guarded Risa. Despite being assaulted by one too many words that "mean nothing", our heart grasp the dilemmas and heart aches playwright Michelle Tan hoped to convey: from the loneliness that comes when one can't truthfully share their happiness with those closest to them; to the gut-wrenching grief that comes not just from death but when people most dear to you leave - because of your decisions.
Retrieved from: Esplanade Presents: The Studios' Facebook Page. Accessed: 27 Apr 2018
These truly heartstring-tugging moments come together in the theatrical space. Sound designer Bani Haykal's at-times-Foley-inspired, at-times-metaphorical soundscape breathe more life to Ellison Tan's one woman performance. And set designer Chun Kaifeng's multi-dimensional set pieces remind us of how our perceptions take different shapes according to the light we shine unto them. What's behind our parents' prying questions that we habitually reply with half truths?
In the end, one leaves the theatre overwhelmed sensually and emotionally. And rightfully so. In a world that moves too fast, bombarded by so much information and opinions and things that demand to be done, how ready are we to say something true to begin living life?